If I order Nachos BellGrande and I accidentally get Nachos Supreme, I swear someone will PAY DEARLY.

There's a 33-year-old woman named Brittani Felton in Flint, Michigan.  And earlier this month, she went through a Taco Bell drive-thru around 2:00 A.M. . . . and the employees got her order wrong.

And she was VERY upset over not getting what she ordered.  So she took out her purple handgun . . . and fired a shot into the building.

The county prosecutor says, quote, "Apparently she wanted her tacos, or her chalupas, or whatever."

Fortunately, no one was hurt . . . but the cops tracked her down, and she was arrested on two felony counts:  Assault with intent to murder and firearm usage.

She's facing a max sentence of LIFE IN PRISON. 

(Mlive / CBS 5 - Flint) 

(Here's her mugshot.)

We've heard of LOTS of different ways people have tried to hide from the cops.  This is a new one.

Last Wednesday, the cops in Stacy, Minnesota got a call from a mobile home park about a 26-year-old woman named Jessie Knickerbocker who was banned from the property.  Her parents live there, so the cops went to their home to look for her.

They asked where Jessie was, and her dad said she was safe.  And he meant it literally . . . because Jessie was hiding inside of a GUN SAFE.

It was about five feet tall, 28 inches wide, and 20 inches deep.  And Jessie was running out of air inside . . . and her dad couldn't get it open.  It took the cops about 10 minutes to finally pry it open, and they found Jessie inside, crouching and sweating.

She was arrested for trespassing. 

(Minneapolis Star Tribune)

(On a related note, the cops in New York caught a woman who was hiding from them last week . . . when she fell out of the ceiling.)

There's a fishing rod case in a landfill somewhere that's worth a LOT of money.

A 49-year-old guy named Clifton Collins from Farnaught, Ireland is a marijuana dealer.  And back in 2011, he invested some of the money he made selling weed in Bitcoin.

Back then, bitcoins cost $4 to $6.  Today, they're worth around $9,700 . . . bringing Clifton's total value up to around $58 million.

But Clifton was arrested in 2017 and locked up for the last few years.  And while he was inside, his landlord cleaned out his place.

It turns out that Clifton had hidden the codes to access the bitcoin inside his fishing rod case.  Without those codes, there's no way to access the money.  And the landlord had no idea . . . so he threw out the fishing case.

It turns out that the dump it went to sends its trash to Germany and China . . . so it's either in a random landfill somewhere in the world, or possibly incinerated.

The Irish government has been trying to seize the bitcoin for the past few years, but they've accepted that they won't be able to get it unless some new technological development allows them to access it. 

(Irish Times)

We've definitely heard of drunk drivers FALLING ASLEEP in fast food drive thru lines before.  But this might be a first.

Earlier this month, the employees at a McDonald's in Troy, Michigan called 911 around 3:00 A.M.

Their drive thru line wasn't moving . . . because TWO drivers had both fallen asleep in their cars.

And when the cops got there, they found both people were drunk . . . and they didn't know each other.  They were just two random drunk people who both decided to go to McDonald's and both fell asleep in line.

They were both arrested for drunk driving. 

(Detroit Free Press)

I applaud this guy's commitment to public transportation . . . although there are just some situations where it's not the right call.

A 55-year-old guy in Seattle robbed a bank on Wednesday, and as the cops got there, they saw him trying to get away in a CAB.

The cops followed the cab, so he got out and ran . . . and then he tried to get away by hopping on a public BUS.

He only made it a few blocks before the cops stopped the bus and arrested him. 

(Seattle Police Department)

This story is like Hansel and Gretel for the opioid era.

Last month, three guys in Clearwater, Florida robbed a CVS . . . and they clearly put a lot of time into the prep.

They struck at 5:00 A.M. wearing surgical gloves, they waved guns and tied up the employees with zip ties, and they knew exactly what they wanted to steal:  As many bottles of opioids like hydrocodone and oxycodone as they could get their hands on.

They ended up getting away with 10,000 or so pills.  But as the cops were investigating the scene, they started noticing pill bottles on the street.  Apparently, as the guys sped away, they were emptying pills they stole into bags, then tossing the bottles out of their car.

So the cops followed the trail of pill bottles . . . all the way to a house where they found the robbers and $320,000 worth of pills.

19-year-old Christopher Rachell, 19-year-old David Dobbins, and 18-year-old Roy Lampkin were all arrested.  And they were all charged with armed robbery, drug trafficking, and false imprisonment.

(Tampa Bay Times) 

(Here are their mugshots.  From left to right: Roy, David, Christopher.)

One of the big stages of growing up is when your parents finally take you off their cell phone family plan.  That's part of being an adult, after all.  But some people just aren't ready for that moment.

There's a 36-year-old woman named Seloni Khetarpal in Jackson Township, Ohio.  And yes, at age 36, her parents were still paying for her cell phone.

They finally cut her off last Thursday.

So . . . she called 911 to demand that the cops go to her house because her parents cut off her service.  The cops told her to call 911 only for a legitimate emergency . . . but she kept calling back.

They finally went to her house and arrested her for disrupting public services, which is a felony.

The cops say she was, quote, "belligerent" when they arrested her, and she said she really thought her parents cutting off her phone service was a legitimate emergency. 

(ABC 5 - Cleveland) 

(Here's her mugshot.)   

Being naked and covered in meat juice with electricity pulsing through your genitalia is no way to go through life.

There's a 28-year-old guy named Stefan Short in DeLand, Florida.  And on Friday night, someone spotted him shoplifting ribeye steaks from a grocery store . . . by shoving them down his pants.

The manager started chasing him and grabbed him, but Stefan wriggled out of his clothes and ran out of the store NAKED.

Unfortunately for him, the cops were waiting outside.  And when he wouldn't stop, they TASED him.

And either accidentally or maybe a little on purpose, one of the Taser prongs went straight into his GENITALS.

He went to the hospital, and there's no word on how his junk is.  He's been charged with theft and resisting arrest. 

(Daytona Beach News-Journal) 

(Here's his mugshot.)

If only every drunk driver made it THIS easy.

There's a 63-year-old guy named Juan Zamora from Kissimmee, Florida.  And last week, he was driving drunk . . . and he got behind a cop car and flashed his headlights.

The cop pulled over, and so did Juan.

Juan asked him for directions to an auto parts store . . . but the cop noticed Juan was wobbling and smelled like alcohol.  So the cop told Juan he needed to take a breathalyzer test.

And Juan refused because, quote, "You didn't pull me over.  I pulled you over."

Technically, that WAS true . . . but not a good enough reason for Juan to get out of the test.  And he wound up blowing a .137, which is over the legal limit.

He was arrested for DUI. 

(Ocala Star-Banner)

Here's one hell of a ridiculous lawsuit for you.

Back in December of 2017, a 16-year-old girl named Samaria Gray was walking down the street in Farmington, New Mexico drunk.  A cop found her, drove her home, and told her to sit in his car while he went in to talk to her mom.

But Samaria got out of the backseat, hopped into the front, and SPED OFF in the cop car.  She hit about 80 miles-an-hour before she crashed into a ravine.  And she was rushed to the hospital in critical condition with a broken leg and other injuries.

WELL . . . Samaria just filed a lawsuit against the COP.

She says it's HIS fault that everything happened.  The suit says he should've restrained her, locked the front door to the car, or taken the keys out of the ignition. 

Her lawyer says, quote, "She was pretty severely intoxicated and we know that severely intoxicated people . . . make really bad decisions, right?  The officer knows that too.  So it was glaring oversight on his part."

The lawsuit is seeking at least $300,000 in damages. 

(CBS 13 - Albuquerque)

I guess there's less of a difference between "American Idol" judges and actual judges than we thought.

An 18-year-old guy named Alexander Grant from North Dunedin, New Zealand was pulled over back in August for driving drunk.  His blood-alcohol level was more than four times the legal limit.

Well, Alexander is a musician.  And after he completed a rehab and education program, the judge delayed his sentencing . . . because Alexander proposed writing a SONG about what he'd learned.

He created a song called "Choices", and when he played it in court this week, it was good enough . . . and heartfelt enough . . . that the prosecutor and judge both decided the charges should be dismissed.

The judge said, quote, "I'm not minimizing drunk driving" . . . but the song made it clear it was, quote, "a one-off error in judgment . . . and you have learned your lesson [and] exceeded my expectations." 

(Stuff.co.nz)

(The song is available on YouTube.)

I've seen people do PLENTY of weird stuff on planes.  But this makes "taking off your shoes and putting your bare feet on the seat in front of you" look normal.

There's a 44-year-old guy named Matthew Flaherty, and he was on a flight last year from London to Iceland.  And he was drinking STRAIGHT GIN out of the bottle and got extremely drunk.

He started hitting on a female passenger, and when she ignored him, he started cursing her out and screaming he was going to kill her family.  Then he shouted more death threats at the flight crew.

Then . . . he took his cell phone apart and started EATING THE PIECES.

He also left the battery on his seat and it started SMOKING.  A flight attendant dunked it in water to get it to stop.

The pilots decided to divert the flight to an airport in Scotland, where Matthew was escorted off the plane and arrested.

He was in court this week and pleaded guilty to several charges, including disorderly conduct and making violent threats.  He'll be sentenced next month. 

(Metro)  

Here's the revenge of every old person who's ever yelled at some damn kids to turn down their damn music.

There's an 82-year-old guy named Ian Trainer in Liverpool, England.  He doesn't hear so well, so when he listens to his classical music, he BLASTS it.

And it got to the point after a few years that his neighbors called the cops.

Back in December, Ian's neighbors got a court order that banned Ian from playing his classical music above a, quote, "normal talking level" of 65 decibels.

But he ignored the warning and just kept blasting his music.

So he was arrested for violating the order. And on Thursday, he was sentenced to 24 WEEKS in JAIL. 

(LancsLive) 

(Here's his mugshot.)

There's nothing like a criminal going down because he opted for carryout instead of delivery.

A guy named Mickey Stines is the sheriff of Letcher County, Kentucky.  And he went to a pizza place over the weekend to grab some pizzas for an archery tournament.

And while he was at the restaurant, another guy walked in to pick up pizzas . . . and Mickey recognized him as a WANTED FUGITIVE.

So Mickey called in another cop, and they arrested the guy on two outstanding warrants.  The guy's name wasn't released.

They also found two guns, ammo, bolt cutters, and drugs in the guy's trunk, so he was hit with several extra charges too. 

(Fox 26 - Wilmington)

I'm not telling anyone how to live their life.  But this guy might want to pursue some more grown-up hobbies.  And maybe look into getting one of those things called a JOB . . .

32-year-old Vincent Chacon wanted a $200 skateboard from a store in Salt Lake City . . . but his MOM wouldn't give him the money for it.

So last Friday he put on a ski mask and ROBBED the place.

An assistant manager tried to stop him, but they let go of the board when he reached into his pocket and claimed he had a gun.

He turned himself in the next day.  He's facing a felony charge for aggravated robbery.

(KSL)

(Here's his mugshot.)

Some criminals will slowly steal money from work over the course of months or years . . . like slipping a few dollars in their pocket instead of the cash register.  Not this guy.  He was ALL shock-and-awe.

A guy was hired at a gas station in Hamden, New Jersey last month.  And on his first shift, he stole $17,183 worth of stuff.  That included lottery tickets, 89 cartons of cigarettes, and cash.

Then he disappeared.

The cops have released a picture of him from the gas station's surveillance cameras to try to get help in identifying him.  They don't know his name his name, because he also stole his employment folder. 

(NBC 30 - New Britain) 

(Here's his picture.)

Isn't stealing a bunch of hard drugs enough of a crime itself . . . did this guy really need to tack on a whole extra crime too?

There's a 29-year-old guy named Jordan Fleming in Springfield, Oregon.  And back in December, he came up with QUITE a plan to rob a drug house.

Jordan typed up a fake search warrant . . . then went to the house, flashed a fake badge, and demanded to search the place.  And while he was inside, he "seized" a bunch of their heroin and meth.

But apparently someone in the house recognized him, because he'd bought drugs there before.  And they got the cops involved . . . the REAL cops.

Jordan was arrested last week and is facing several charges, including robbery, heroin possession, and impersonating a police officer.

Now the cops are looking into charges against the people who were running the drug house. 

(The Oregonian) 

(Here's Jordan's mugshot.)

You know how couples sometimes smear cake on each other's faces at their wedding?  Maybe this woman was just practicing that.

A 41-year-old woman named Jane Marie Faulkner in St. Petersburg, Florida got into a drunk argument with her fiancé on Friday night. 

And at some point, she picked up some DOG POOP . . . and smeared it in his FACE.

He called the cops, and when they got there, Jane admitted to doing it.

She was arrested for domestic battery and she's been ordered to not have any contact with her fiancé.

There's no word on whether this is going to affect their wedding plans. 

(The Smoking Gun)

I'm sure the cops always appreciate it when nature gives them an assist.

The cops in Howick, Ontario, Canada got a call last week about a wanted 28-year-old guy who might be in the area.  He was wanted on charges including car theft, failing to stop for police, and a probation violation.

They found his truck and followed the footprints to a large tree . . . and when they looked up, they spotted the guy hiding about 30 feet up.

But he wasn't hiding from the cops.  He told them a COYOTE had been chasing him and he climbed the tree to escape.

The cops told him to come down, and he was happy to since he was freezing . . . and then they arrested him. 

(Owen Sound Sun Times)