You've heard the term "silent but deadly."  Now here's "loud and deadly" with a little crazy mixed in . . .

A 37-year-old woman named Shanetta Wilson was standing in line at a Dollar General store near Fort Lauderdale on Sunday when she loudly PASSED GAS.

Apparently she cut a good one, and didn't even try to muffle it.  So a 55-year-old guy who was also in line said something about it.

And Shanetta responded by pulling out a pocket knife and threatening to, quote, "GUT HIM" over it.

She pulled the knife back like she was about to stab him, but stopped and walked out of the store.  Then someone called the cops, and they picked her up nearby.

She's facing charges for aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, without intent to kill. 

(Miami Herald / The Smoking Gun)

(Here's her mugshot.)

There's a fine line between being Q from "James Bond" and being a petty criminal.

There's a 70-year-old guy named Robert Davis from Key Largo, Florida.

And he installed remote-controlled black SHIELDS that he could roll down over the license plates on his minivan . . . so he wouldn't have to pay tolls when he went past toll cameras.

And Robert kept getting away with it until about a week-and-a-half ago, when an off-duty Florida Highway Patrol officer randomly spotted the license plate shields in action at a toll plaza.

Robert was arrested and charged with organized fraud and petit theft. 

(Florida Keys News)

(Here's Robert's mugshot.)

(And here's a video someone else shot over the summer showing the shields in action.)

There's a guy named Jason Stiber in Westport, Connecticut, and he says he's, quote, "going to trial for justice."  But . . . um . . . it's not exactly the kind of justice that's going to change the world.

Back on April 11th, around 6:00 A.M., Jason was pulled over for distracted driving.  The cop said he saw Jason talking on a phone, and gave him a $300 ticket.

BUT . . . Jason says he wasn't talking on the phone, he was eating hash browns from McDonald's.

And he has some evidence backing it up:  His call log shows he wasn't on the phone . . . and his car has Bluetooth, so he wouldn't hold up his phone to make calls.

In spite of all that, a judge still found him guilty when he tried to fight the ticket in August.

So Jason's quest for justice is still going.  He requested a re-trial, and he'll have it next month.  And this time, he hired a lawyer for $1,000 . . . which is about the same amount his car insurance went up because of the ticket. 

(Albany Times-Union)

This might actually be THE worst possible way to try to get out of an unhappy marriage.  THE worst.

There's a 48-year-old guy named Antonio Burgos from Portland, Oregon.  And his wife moved here from El Salvador to be with him.

But they'd been having trouble, and back in June, they were trying to get a divorce.

So Antonio came up with plan B . . . he contacted an ICE agent and tried to get him to DEPORT his wife and her daughter from a previous relationship.  And he offered to bribe the Customs agent with $3,000 to get him to do it.

But the ICE agent turned him in, and Antonio was arrested for bribing a public official.

Antonio pleaded guilty last week.  He was facing up to 15 years in prison and a $250,000 fine . . . but since he took a plea, his punishment will probably be much lighter than that.

He won't be sentenced until May . . . and he'll be in federal prison until then. 

(NBC News)

  Yeah, pretty much every kid HATES the dentist.  But I'm going to go ahead and promise you this ISN'T the right way to get them to go.

There's a 36-year-old woman named Shaurice Jones from Bath, Pennsylvania.  And last week, her 12-year-old son had a dentist appointment . . . and he did NOT want to go.

And he was SO against going that he climbed onto the hood of his mom's car.

So . . . she started driving anyway.  But instead of going to the dentist, she drove two miles to the police station on streets where the speed limit was 40 . . . apparently because she hoped they would help her convince her son to go to the dentist.

But when she got there, the cops WEREN'T interested in helping with the dentist argument . . . and they WERE interested in Shaurice driving two miles with her son on the hood of her car.

She was arrested and charged with child endangerment and reckless endangerment.

(Lehigh Valley Live / The Smoking Gun) 

(Here's her picture.)

If you're an ordinary middle-aged dude and a young, attractive stranger seduces you out of nowhere . . . MAYBE there's an ulterior motive there.

There's a 52-year-old guy from New Jersey, and last week, he was gambling at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel and Casino in Hollywood, Florida.

Well . . . a 30-year-old woman named Cassidy Paris walked up to him, told him he looked stressed, and offered to go up to his hotel room to give him a massage.  He didn't see anything suspicious about that, so he said okay.

When they got up there, they started kissing, then Cassidy headed off to the bathroom.  And then shortly after that, the guy heard his hotel room door open and close.

It turned out Cassidy had been scamming him . . . shocker . . . and she made off with $10,000 in cash, $6,100 in chips, and his $50,000 watch.

Fortunately for him, the cops were able to find her on surveillance video from the casino . . . where they saw footage of her getting into a car.  And they traced that car to a motel about four miles away, where she was arrested. 

(South Florida Sun Sentinel)

(Here's her mugshot.)

FULL STORY:  The New York Jets are not having a good season.  Which isn't exactly breaking news, but it's been hard on all their fans who inexplicably thought they'd turn things around THIS year . . .

There's a 57-year-old guy named Christopher Greyshock from West Milford, New Jersey.  And on Sunday, around 5:00 P.M., he rear-ended another car.

When the cops got to the scene, they gave Christopher a sobriety test . . . and in the middle of it, he admitted he was drunk.

He said he, quote, "drank too much because the Jets suck."

The Jets lost earlier that day, 41-to-10, to the Buffalo Bills.

He was arrested and hit with several charges, including a DWI. 

(CBS 2 - New York) 

(Here's his mugshot.)

 Isn't the point of crashing a wedding to have a good time WITHOUT getting caught?

There's a 46-year-old woman named Christine Chandler from Treasure Island, Florida.  And on Sunday night around 10:00 P.M., she went into a Lions Club where there was a wedding going on, and headed straight for the dance floor.

Unfortunately, the bride and groom were having their "last dance" at that moment . . . and they didn't really want a stranger cutting in.

Some other guests told Christine to leave and they escorted her out.  But she wound up coming back . . . and headed straight back to the dance floor.

At that point, people called the cops . . . and Christine was arrested for disorderly conduct. 

(The Smoking Gun) 

(Here's her mugshot.)

ReplyForward

 If you're gonna get kicked out of some place for making a scene, you might as well REALLY make a scene.

There's a 42-year-old woman named Kimberly Gabel from St. Petersburg, Florida.  On Saturday night she was at a Red Lobster, and she was drunk and bothering other people, so the manager asked her to leave.

She stormed out, cursing the whole way . . . but right before she left, she stopped at the tank in the lobby where there are a bunch of live lobsters.

And she reached in . . . GRABBED ONE . . . then took off.

The store called 911, and a cop tracked down Kimberly nearby, still swearing.  She was arrested for disorderly intoxication.

As for the lobster . . . well, we don't know.  When the cop found Kimberly, she didn't have it with her, and as far as we know, it's still missing. 

(The Smoking Gun) 

(Here's her mugshot.)

If you've ever doubted the FREAKISH connection that twins have, check this out . . .

23-year-old Bao Nhia Julia Yang and Bao Kou Julie Yang are twin sisters from Fresno, California.

And on Sunday night . . . they both gave BIRTH.  Both to baby girls.  Both at the same hospital.  And both babies were within three ounces of each other.

They didn't coordinate getting pregnant at the same time . . . but it happened anyway, like stuff always seems to do for twins.

Their due dates were two days apart, but Bao Kou called her sister on Sunday to say she was in labor and was heading to the hospital, and Bou Nhia told her, quote, "I might be in there with you too."

The nurse who delivered their babies said she's never seen twins give birth on the same day before.  Quote, "They just had great timing." 

(Your Central Valley) 

(Here's a picture of the twins with their babies.  Bao Nhia is on the left.)

  Getting to commit a good deed AND overeat on donuts?  Now that's the kind of philanthropy I'm always looking for.

There's a guy named John Chhan who owns a donut shop in Seal Beach, California.  He and his wife Stella have been working together at the shop every morning for almost 40 years.

But some of his regular customers recently noticed Stella wasn't there.  John told them she'd had an aneurysm, so he was working at the store every day and then rushing home to be with her at night.

His regulars wanted to set up a GoFundMe, but he said no.  So they came up with an even better plan to help him:  Buying up all of his inventory every day.

John's policy has always been to stay open until he sells out.  So now that everyone's buying up his donuts early in the morning, he can spend as much of the day as possible with Stella.

And, fortunately, he says she's improving.  Quote, "She can talk, she can write.  Right now she's trying to start eat[ing]." 

(CBS 2 - Los Angeles)  

There's an assistant principal in Louisiana whose school has been doing Alcohol Awareness Week this week.  And apparently, she was like, "You had me at 'alcohol.'"

The cops in Pierre Part, in southern Louisiana, got a call on Monday about a dangerous driver on the highway.  They wound up following the car . . . all the way to an elementary school parking lot.

And the woman driving was 49-year-old Rachel Turley, who's the assistant principal at that school.  And yeah, Monday was the first day of the school's Red Ribbon week, which is their annual event for alcohol awareness.

Her blood-alcohol level was almost three times the legal limit, so she was arrested for driving while intoxicated and careless operation.  There's no word on whether she still has a job. 

(ABC 2 - Baton Rouge) 

(Here's her mugshot.)